As humans we have established bonds with family members and with our friends and community. When these bonds are severed the experience of grief can be profound. Although each persons experience of and reaction to bereavement is unique the depth of mourning that accompanies this is felt to the core of the self.
The shock and sudden nature of death, even when it is expected, can be experienced as terrifying and disorganised feelings, thoughts and behaviours can ensue. Although it is something that most humans will encounter there is little in our western society to prepare us for it and so over the months following death and loss, feelings of difference and confusion can dominate. As time goes on family and friends also take up their life again. Often, however the one who mourns is left with emptiness and an aloneness that others can not share.
Counselling can be helpful at any stage of mourning. From the initial shock and trauma of the first few days to months and years down the track. It is not unusual for the service to see people who wish to share thoughts and feelings about a loved one who had died many years before. The theoretical underpinning of Bereavement Counselling holds that mourning is a natural process. As bereavement counsellors we do not inhibit this process. Rather we accompany the client through their individual experiences of grief. Sometimes there is an absence of feeling and a sense of numbness which may cause confusion. Sometimes there is just pain and a feeling that life has no meaning. Sometimes there is guilt and despair. One can also experience an absence of feeling but may suffer from physical pain such as an ache in the chest or stomach problems. Others may have thoughts that are disturbing and questions about "why" and "if only".
The experience of grief is such that it may be difficult to express your needs in relation to counselling. Thus you may benefit from attending a session to discuss how counselling can help you and from there a decision can be made about how to proceed.